Posted by: donnatallman | April 23, 2014

Telling Myself the Truth

“Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, and in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom.” Psalm 51:6

Photo by Donna Tallman

Photo by Donna Tallman

I don’t need any help.
I’m not angry; I’m justifiably indignant.
I’m not worried; I’m concerned.
That _________ (person, food, drink, drug, etc.) doesn’t tempt me at all.
I’m not depressed, just tired.
I’m fine…fine.
I didn’t do it!

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I have trouble telling myself the truth. Snagged by my conscience or arrested by the Spirit of God, I dodge, twist, and turn to avoid the spotlight of God’s detection. King David was more honorable than that. Confronted by Nathan the prophet for his adulterous affair with Bathsheba, David immediately agreed with God that he was in the wrong and repented. Then David invited God in to purify his heart and clean up the mess he’d made of his life. I’m not always so eager. 

Photo by Donna Tallman

Photo by Donna Tallman

Psalm 51 is the tangible record of God’s redemptive inner work in a heart gone astray. It is a highly significant passage of the Bible to me. It ranks up there with Isaiah 55, John 14, and the entire book of Philippians as the most well traveled of sections in my Bible. I’ve underlined several verses, scratched notes around the margins, and written several dates when God intersected me there. While others might see only the mess I’ve made of Psalm 51 in my Bible, I see a written record of the many times I’ve been desperate for its encouragement.

Hollywood has made a fortune over the years making films about characters that go back in time to redo their lives and reverse the decisions they made. I have to admit that many of my favorite films fall into this genre. Psalm 51 is the Psalm of the “do over.” This Psalm is about returning; it’s about restoration and redemption. David has given us an example of true humility playing out in real time, and he’s also given us the privilege of journeying with him through his darkest hours.

Re-turn. Re-store. Re-deem.

Redux. I want a rewrite. Actually, I’d rather have an “unwrite” of the horrible decisions I’ve made throughout my life and the things that have caused me pain. I’d also love to unwrite the things in your life that have hurt you too, but that’s not how God works. God doesn’t erase; he doesn’t remove. Instead, God redeems. He takes what is and transforms it. God takes the marred and damaged parts of us and reforms us into new creations. Our flaws become the foundation for his ultimate masterpiece. In our darkest hours, God does his deepest and most spectacular work!

Donna Tallman

Donna Tallman

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17 (ESV)

How does God re-create us in real time? He does it by connecting with our innermost beings. When we are transparent with God and permit him access to the innermost place of our hearts, he will enter and begin his work in our lives.

In order for God to connect with my innermost being he needs:

~ My fully cooperative mind
~ My surrendered will
~ My wide open heart (emotions)
~ My sincere and humble spirit

Photo by Donna Tallman

Donna Tallman

Father, thank you for calling me into relationship with you. Thank you for pursuing me in the morning and walking alongside me in the cool of the day. Thank you for persisting even when I try to elude you. Jesus, I need courage today. I need the courage to be honest with you about my life. Help me not to cower in fear or shame when your truth shines on my shortcomings. Your truth is my protection; teach me to love it and welcome it into the innermost place of my heart.

© Copyright, 2014 by Donna Tallman.





  1. Especially poignant today… thank you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: